March 26, 2019: "We've Got the Flu," by Matt Halvorson
I have cleaned up enough poop to last a lifetime.
And I have aired out more stinky rooms than I have words that rhyme.
And I’ve been awake all hours of the night and day,
through aches and pains and stomach pangs,
all the washing hands and wiping down with rags…
I have plunged free enough toilets for a thousand years,
And I don’t even feel it anymore. Ain’t no triumph when the pipe clears.
A jaded plumber now, my crack is probably showin’
As I give my kid another midnight bubblebath, ‘cause he just can’t stop going…
Poop!
Poop!
Poop!
We’ve got the flu!
Poop!
And vomit too!
We’ve got poop!
We’ve got the flu.